Are Your Friendships Healthy Or Toxic?
And how to build healthy friendships
In this blog...
Are You In Credit In Your Friendships?
Why do people connect?
Now, the easiest way to start this technique is just imagine it financial.
Imagine you go to a bank and that bank doesn't know you at all, so naturally they don't trust you. You join the bank and then you invest money into that bank every single week or every single month. And then by the end of the year, the bank comes up to you and says, look, you've been a fantastic customer with us. You've invested a lot in us, so if you need a loan, if you're having a shortage of cash, then you come to us, and we will support you.
So now imagine it on a different level. Imagine person A and person B, but still keeping it on a financial level. So when person A and person B come together, they find that there's a connection, there's a click in some way.
So if you imagine person A enjoying person B's company, thinks I want him to invest in person A because I like them. So again, just financial. Imagine person A invests a 100 of their currency (dollars / pounds) into person B. And then person B thinks, well, I not only like person A, but they've also invested in me. So what I'm going to do is invest back into person A. But this time, I'm not going to invest a hundred, I'm going to invest 105.
So, they increase the level of investment. Now that is a true friendship, and an amazing credit rating where two people come together, and they keep investing in each other in such a way that they feel fulfilled and harmonious.
Now, imagine if say just financially that one day person A for example, just was really, really short of cash, and they really needed money really quick. Person B looks at person A and says, look, I've got this credit that you've given me all these years, and I've got some money spare. So, I see you haven't got any, I'll give you that money until you get back on your feet. And then person A says, thank you very much, gets back on their feet and then keeps on investing. This is reciprocation, they keep giving and supporting each other to a harmonious growth!
The test of truth!
So now with this, what I want you to do is imagine this reciprocation with all of the people in your life, and I mean 'all' of the people in your life. This comes down to your family, your friends, your work colleagues, your acquaintances, and you personally because, each and every day you're investing in yourself.
Before we get onto looking at all the people in your life is, what to you is an investment, and what to you is a withdrawal? Now, for some people an investment could be somebody spending time with them, or somebody taking them on a holiday, or somebody making love to them, or somebody telling them that something special that they've never told them or anybody else, it's a special secret.
Or it could be a withdrawal for example, it could be a judgement, a criticism, a demand of their time when they know that, that person hasn't gotten that time to give.
And look at how much investment is going on from you to them, and how much investment is going from them to you. And also, how much withdrawal is going from you to them, and how much withdrawal is going from them to you. And with that, when you put everything down on paper, you will see why you feel really fulfilled with some people in your life, and why you feel exhausted. Or you just don't want to be around certain people in your life.
Be prepared to adapt!
So like you say, if you feel comfortable, do this, but make sure you do with the most important person, and that is with yourself. Do you invest in yourself, are you kind to yourself, or do you make judgements on yourself? Because, we can make too many withdrawals on ourselves, not like the person that we see in the mirror?
Like anything in life, friendships take time and effort to keep them flowing and abundant. It is important to keep regular checks on how fulfilled you are with the people in your life as toxic energy can take much more than your time, but abundant love can give you much more than a warm feeling inside!
How much do you invest and withdraw from the people in your life and vise-versa?