Trying too hard???

 How trying to reach the top can sometimes do the opposite!


In this blog...

  • Are you trying to reach perfection?
  • The inevitable truth of perfection
  • How to be happy with what you have

What is perfection? How many people working themselves into the ground each day trying to attain this status actually stop to ask themselves...what is perfection and why is important for me to reach that level? In this blog we will take a deeper look into the often self destructive cycle of achievement.

Are you trying to reach perfection?

There is a huge difference between success and perfection! When you are doing things in life (what ever that may be) do you find yourself continually adding to it to get it 'perfect'? Does it always have to be the best and nothing less will do? If this is you, have you ever stopped to ask yourself...

Q: How much energy is this taking?

Q: What is it you are REALLY trying to achieve?

Q: Who is it you are REALLY doing it for?

The inevitable truth of perfection

Assuming that you will feel happy when you ‘attain’ being ‘perfect’ is impossible!
The appearance of perfection is only what the mind has constructed as perfect based on the only reality it has seen. This reality may be what other people have said is what is right or it could be yours or another persons over hyped expectation! 

However if a person then attaches the state of perfection to their happiness or feeling that they are valuable...their 'happiness then is dependent upon achieving the state of 'perfection'!

Hence ‘perfection’ is a state based upon a selection of pre-defined conditions – those pre-defined conditions will then become a prison because once perfection is gained the seeker then becomes fearful of losing that state – ie losing happiness! Therefore their ‘state’ owns them…. traps them, imprisons them! Anything less than perfect is not acceptable if it is based upon external values. Should those values change or unable to be attained for some reason then the state of perfection (and therefor their happiness) is taken away leaving the person chasing ‘another perfection'

How to be happy with what you have!

Becoming the best you can be is about growth ‘not’ perfection! Life is about learning to be in the moment and experience things. Very often people want to be perfect based on what they think other people will think of them or living up to another persons expectations. 

Whenever you do anything in the future ask yourself these question...

1. What am I really aiming to achieve by doing this?

2. Do I feel I need to be the best...and if so why?

3. Am I trying to live up to another persons standards to gain their approval? 

4. If I am why do I want their approval so much?

5. What would happen if I did well but wasn't perfect? How would I feel?

6. Could I just be in the moment and let what happens happen?

Conclusion

In life it is vitally important to realise what it is you are doing and why you are doing it. Do you ever find yourself working yourself into the ground trying to achieve an unrealistic expectation? Or do you find that you have set your own standards so high that you feel anxiety about being anything less? 

Break eggs...make an omelette!

Sometimes we can create a noose around our own neck by trying to achieve perfection when really that perfection may simply be a fear of not being good enough in our own eyes and therefore potentially risking rejection. Though anybody who would reject somebody for not 'being perfect' is somebody who is continually judging themselves with the same stick. 

Perfectionism is not success. Success is growth and learning...perfection is anxiety based! 
If you ever feel the need to be perfect stop for a moment and ask yourself why!

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